That Ish I Don’t Like…


Look! I’m hugging black babies so clearly I’m not racist.

I can’t take “liberal” white people.

For those of you who do not know, a liberal white person is your typical democrat-voting white person.  They may or may not support President Obama and they may or may not have an ancestor (somewhere) who was anti-slavery or pro-integration.  The really brave ones will “stand up for what they believe in” by saying it out loud or by re-posting social justice quotes on their social media pages, while the timid ones will quietly observe (or even go along with) wrong-doings but be secretly “tormented” by their actions until the day they die.

The liberal white will use weak, vague phrases like, “some people would argue”, or “this is not confirmed but [I’m going to spread it anyway because this is what I secretly believe myself]”.

The liberal white person is the white person who congratulates himself for being “cultured” because he “appreciates” other cultures by appropriating them through film productions and highly publicized Black History Month celebrations.  The liberal white buys “ethnic” art and takes mission trips to brown and black countries where he/she scores great Facebook profile pictures of themselves hugging or high-fiving black and brown babies.

As a result of doing all or some of these things without flinching or without allowing racist thoughts to fully develop in their heads before they push them out, the white liberal assumes he has “overcome” the racism that afflicts so many of his counterparts.

These people, these so-called liberal white people, irritate and frustrate me immeasurably; even more-so than the conservative, proud-to-be-American, Republican-voting white people (yes, to me the “liberal” ones are worse).

While the above offenses are bad enough, it is the psychology behind these offenses that bothers me most.  Here’s what I mean:

While at a conference, I excused myself from a presentation to freshen up and to grab a little something from the snack table that the conference had laid out. While minding my own black business grabbing some snacks, a curly-haired white woman (who honestly looked like she was high on prescription drugs) bounced over specifically to tell me that she loved my hair. I smiled graciously and thanked her and turned to continue with what I was doing. Completely ignoring my distancing body language, she persisted informing me that she’s “so glad ‘the natural’ was coming back into style”. Then she told me that my hair (I’m what you would call “natural”) reminded her of her (and this is the exact way she said it) “sistahs from the 60s”.

Let’s just pause for a moment and evaluate why this whole scene irritated me:
First of all, she switched to “home-girl” speech with me. Why do white people do that? Why do they think they have to speak the “native” language just to talk to you? Why do they think they have to talk to you? People are not obligated to listen to what you say, white people, so if a person isn’t interested in talking to you, keep it moving.
(And FYI, white people, no one but you still say “girlfriend”, “what’s cracka lackin”, and “off the hizzle foshizzle”. Stop talking like that to us unless your intent is to be laughed at, instead of laughed with.)

Anyway, I brushed her comment off and kept about my business. For reasons I cannot completely understand, my mounting disinterest encouraged her to pursue me harder. She concluded telling me that “back then” she, too had a “curly fro”.

Okay, so now I’m like:


This experience was made even stranger when I bumped into the white lady a second time while I was with a friend, another young lady also attending the conference–also black, also natural. You would’ve thought that white lady had died and gone to heaven. She started asking us about YouTube videos of black children drumming on the ground or on tree stumps or something in some rain forest somewhere in Africa or South America. Neither of us had any idea what she was talking about, but still, we couldn’t have gotten rid of her if we had tried.

We had absolutely nothing in common with this lady and yet she was still determined to be a part of our lives during that conference whether we seemed like we wanted her to or not.

This is what I can’t take about the liberal white; they force themselves inside of your world based on their “love” or, as I like to call it, their obsession with you.  They differ here, from the conservative white in that the conservative intrudes your world based on their hate for you.  This is the only difference.

While the conservative white will kidnap and enslave you because it will make him a lot of money, or because he thinks you’re beneath him, or that you deserve it, the liberal white will kidnap and enslave you so that he may introduce you to Jesus and save your soul, or because he thinks you deserve to have a lifestyle “equal” to his (which assumes that there is something wrong with you life as is).  This is the only difference.


Wouldn’t I look ridiculous wearing and doing this?

I’m never impressed by white people who “love” black culture or black children or black women or black men.  That’s strange to me.  What if I just ran around telling people that I love Mexican people and Mexican culture?  What if I expressed that love by placing a little tiny Mexican figurine on my dashboard?  What if I had a whole “Mexican” room in my house and read book after book after book on Mexican culture so that when I meet Mexican people I can identify with their Mexican culture and even go so far as to explain parts of their culture to them?  What if, after all of this, a Mexican lady (who I have been calling my friend) tells me that the way I caricaturize, or mimic, or mock her culture offends her, and in response, I tell her that she is overreacting or that she needs to calm down or stop being so sensitive or easily offended?  If not racist, wouldn’t you at least call me insensitive?

This is what I can’t take about the so-called liberal white person; he is insensitive.  He is so certain that he is not racist, that he refuses to check himself even when he exhibits extremely racist behavior.  As a result, the liberal white is just as racist, if not more, than the conservative white.  While the conservative will admit to himself and to you that he hates you, the liberal white has yet to even to make that realization.



Relationship How-to

And This is For Colored People Who Always End Up Alone…Check out this amazing post by my husband and fellow blogger. 🙂



Let me start by saying the above picture is only one scenario, probably created by someone who experienced it this way. BUT, the characters in the picture could easily be reversed, and it would still serve my purposes here just as well. This is NOT a woman-bashing or man-bashing post! I’m only offering my answer to this “problem”.

And that leads to my first point: Ain’t no shortage of love in the world. Not everyone is experiencing horrible outcomes in their relationships. Not everyone is falling out of love. It IS possible to have a beautiful, loving relationship with a person who enriches your life and makes you better. But you will never find anything which, deep down, you don’t even believe exists. Don’t cheat yourself out of true love by doubting.

Second point: Birds of a feather go out together. Usually, when you like someone, it’s because of “all…

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